Woe is me. I am sick in ways that we aren’t going into. Let’s play:
Point to the Turning Point
how to play: think about what sounds good to eat when your stomach is upset, and what foods cause upset stomach. In the following list of foods I’ve eaten in the last 72 hours, try to guess when I started feeling ill.
• Sausage from the German’s parents, very dry and very garlicky and absolutely delicious
• Cheese from the downstairs cheesemonger, stinky
• Vollkornbrod (heavy brown whole wheat bread)
• Cheese from the Austrian market, so good we accidently bought a half-kilo
• Sausage coated with dried herbs in tiny links, also Austrian and made from venison, I think
• Sausage and Cheese on Vollkornbrod, for breakfast on the way out the door to farm country
• Cheese from the farmstand in the Holsteiner region, some fresh and some aged
• Sausage from a different farmstand, but probably made out of Holsteins.
• Cheese of the super strong variety, billed as a German specialty,
• Sausage, smoked, made with red wine
• Cheese and sausage on Vollkornbrod, odds and ends from earlier meals
• Weak mint tea
• Bland crackers
• Tiny sips of Coke
I’ve spent the last day moping around the house, feeling sorry for myself because there’s delicious cheese and sausage everywhere and all of it is suddenly repugnant. Butter doesn’t sound good, bacon doesn’t sound good, not even pudding sounds good. Eggs are too smelly, yoghurt is too strong, chocolate toffees are too much work to chew.
I am feeling very wan.
Oh my god, ya’ll, help me: I think I’ve gone vegan.