What’s the Word for ‘I Didn’t Plan for This Period?’

Period today.

Guess I’m not pregnant this time.

Good practice, though, right?

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Blood makes the grass grow*.

But grass is not a baby.

And I want more kids.

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Diapers make good pads,

if your other option is

speaking Italian.

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So that’s that, for now. We’ll wait a few months to try again with the old hanky panky (by which I mean paying our Reproductive Assistance Center 2,000 Euro to transfer an embryo,) and in the meantime we’ll enjoy our long weekend in Milan.

Yes, I really did use a diaper as a sanitary napkin last night. I couldn’t find an open grocery/drugstore and couldn’t get farther than ‘serviette’ and ‘sangre’ in explaining what I needed to the proprietor of the only place open on our street, the tobacconist. The diaper (size 3 disposable is recommended if you’re planning on trying this at home,) worked a treat.

*for the non-Quakers, this comes from a rugby chant: ‘Blood makes the grass grow. Kill, Quakers, kill!’ More info on Quakerism, which sounds like a cult but is really a nice, non-proselytizing religion with an emphasis on pacifism and social justice, can be found here.

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