I’m Nice, You’re Nice, Let’s Have Some Water Ice

You know how there’s lavender everything now: soap, tea, ice cream, etc.? This makes me think about the things we run into every day that seem as though they just might be really delicious ice cream flavors, if only they were food. Please to enjoy today’s game:
The 32nd Flavor
Pretend you’re at the ice cream shop, and you can have one scoop of any of the following. Which would you pick?

Glue. You know you want it.

The gel that old laptop screens are made of. The gel turns every color, and changes very quickly. Would its taste do the same thing? Sometimes it would all taste the same, and sometimes each part would taste different. Also the gel seems like light comes from it, which could be a spectacular ice cream topping. This brings us to…

Firefly guts. I can barely believe that I don’t literally know what these taste like, having smeared them on my hands aplenty. I continue to imagine that they taste like very bland limeade that’s made with waaaaay too much sugar and has a faint food-coloring aftertaste. In their best state, they could taste like lemon verbena soap smells, but sweet: like an herby key lime pie custard.

My yellow dress. I have a dress that is sunshine yellow cotton pique. It’s not lemon yellow, and it’s not butter yellow; it’s not the color of any known food, but its yellow still looks delicious.

The soot that is on buildings in New York. Obviously you’re not going to waste your one scoop on this one, because you think that you know exactly how it tastes. But are you sure? Or is there some nagging doubt? Diamonds come from coal, you know, and maybe soot is the precursor to champagne. Soot sorbet could have a sparkly, not-too-sweet mineral taste that’s perfectly refreshing.

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